Nah, I'd call it 'What's Eating Gilbert's Gape'.

I used that as a pub quiz team name once but nobody else found it funny.

Metal Iain wrote:Nah, I'd call it 'What's Eating Gilbert's Gape'.

I used that as a pub quiz team name once but nobody else found it funny.

No one finds anything you do funny.

I've named quiz teams "Stephen Hawking's Football Boots" or "Universally Challenged" many times, in honour of The Office.

Hardly anyone in the pub gets it. All fucking wankers.

ribbons69 wrote:

Metal Iain wrote:Nah, I'd call it 'What's Eating Gilbert's Gape'.

I used that as a pub quiz team name once but nobody else found it funny.

No one finds anything you do funny.

I think you'll find everyone finds everything I do funny.

the only funny thing that you've done is shit yourself in a bathroom

I'm there.

Bangover wrote:the only funny thing that you've done is shit yourself in a bathroom

Lies!

What about that time I assaulted a barmaid?

Bangover wrote:the only funny thing that you've done is shit yourself in a bathroom

Isn't that where you're meant to do it?

in your own pants??

Lev - Pulverizer wrote:

Bangover wrote:the only funny thing that you've done is shit yourself in a bathroom

Isn't that where you're meant to do it?

Americans shit in the bathroom, we frequent the toilet my dear fellow.

Metal Iain wrote:

Bangover wrote:the only funny thing that you've done is shit yourself in a bathroom

Lies!

What about that time I assaulted a barmaid?

Tell me more, Tell me more

Did you get very far?

thrash metal maniac wrote:in your own pants??

I didn't shit in my own pants, I fell off the bog mid-shit and shat everywhere. It was all over the walls and everything. I lay in it for about an hour, periodically heaving my self up to the sink to vomit.

MartinC wrote:

Metal Iain wrote:

Bangover wrote:the only funny thing that you've done is shit yourself in a bathroom

Lies!

What about that time I assaulted a barmaid?

Tell me more, Tell me more

Did you get very far?

I was at a shitty pub in Glasgow getting smashed and started fannying about. Sadly, my antics caught the eye of the barman who then refused to serve me more booze. In retaliation I stood there flipping him off. Then a barmaid came from nowhere to escort me from the premises. She caught me off guard so I lunged at her, shoving her what must have been fifteen feet through the air. She took a pretty nasty spill and seemed to bang her head. People were looking at me as if I'd just done something bad so I hightailed it out of there, got in a taxi and told him to drive like fuck.

It's not as if I hit her on anything but, judging by the fall and subsequent dramatic slide across the floor into a table, there could have been head trauma.

Excellent.

Iain, you are a king among men.