Well, I've done some daft shit in my life to date but tonight was a fucking new awakening or something! Guess what, chaps! I got thrown out of a club tonight because I got caught shagging a bird in the bogs. Fair enough, I was sitting on the shitter but the bouncers peered over the neighbouring cubicles and drew attention to us. Whilst I'm pretty impressed by the efficiency of bouncers, I'm fucking gutted I had to run away with a bird and try to finish myself off with her in an alleyway.

This is probably my proudest moment, hence why I'm posting it at ten to four on a Sunday morning. Martin can do as he pleases but he's yet to post something as great as this. Honestly, I got thrown out of a club with my knob out because I got caught shagging a bird in the bogs.

I'm proud of myself!

I bet you pooed on her and everywhere as well you horrible, horrible man.

Fair play to you iain, thats what i say.

This doesnt top the couple caught shagging inthe bogs at the thrash metal massacre gig tho......................

Immortalicide wrote:Fair play to you iain, thats what i say.

This doesnt top the couple caught shagging inthe bogs at the thrash metal massacre gig tho......................

Dont tell Zurab!

A watershed moment for sure. Well done

rubbish thread, not interested.

Big deal you lost your cherry.

terrorizer wrote:Big deal you lost your cherry.

TEE-HEE!

In public toilets? That's disgusting

Well, in a club. It was hardly private, though. I think the bouncers were actually quite amused.

Yeah like they never see people shagging in the toilets ever. You were probably the tenth that night.

Still, it's one to tell the grandchildren.

"Go on Grandad Iain, tell me the story about how you got thrown out of that nightclub for shagging a wee lassie in the toilets ken?"

'Ach, well, kids. It waaaas a fine September evenin'. This wee dirty came up t'me when A waaaas waitin' fir ma pint, ken. Next thing A know, am pure pumpin' the fuck out 'er in the bogs eh.'