James wrote:And the gapes of maws.

The Gapes of Wrath.

hahaha nice.

Yes buses suck, I've had countless late, not stopping and cunt bus driver stories, however one of the best was when I was about 6 I got on the bus with my Brother and Sister after being walked to the stop by my Dad. Normally the number 2 bus which, we got on, would stop right outside our school but half way there the driver decided to change to a number 3 so we had to figure out where was the closest part of the route to our school and walk the rest, what a knob!

Sort of a bus story:

When i was at school, we went on a day trip to the royal show (Being a country boy, i went to a rural school), and while we were there, we split into groups and went off for the day with a list of stuff we had to do to justify the days jolly. Come dinner time, the 6 of us all sat down on a quiet bit of grass at the rear of the beer tent enclosure. It was at this point we realised that behind the flimsy tent like wall, we could mick bottles of beer. We all got shit-faced, especially a lad called Adrian, who was really ill all the way home, dogging his lungs up into a carrier bag one of the teachers gave him. When we got near to school, the bus swung round into the school entrance just as adrian stood up, jelly-legged, and he dropped the bag of puke which proceeded to run the full length of the bus and cover some peoples shoes and bags and stunk to fuck. Funny in retrospect, but we were all severly bollocked for getting drunk, and banned from subsequent trips for 6 months

Brilliant, I remember going to the county show with school and spending most of our time there nicking helium balloons and talking like high pitched idiots.

This one time, I was about to get on the bus, just about to hand the money over to the driver when I notice something odd. I couldn't put my finger on it, but then I saw this bizarre gleam in his eye, it was Shang Tsung! He yelled out "YOUR SOUL IS MINE!!!" and we started fighting, after a while I managed to freeze him and uppercut his head off, releasing the souls of a thousand dead warriors.

Only problem was, I had to wait for the next bus, which was well bloody late, so I was half an hour late for work.

Took us 6-7 hours to get to London from Rugby with Scythian. Train was down and some replacement-bus worker sent us 40 hours in the wrong direction.
We got back to Rugby then after one and a half hours and gave him a piece of our mind. What a fucking idiot.
Was a nice trip.

Besides of that I really have never had a negative expeirence with public transport except some tube closures here and there plus London rushhours.

I usually arrive at bus stops around 5 minutes early and wait for a bus that's late 90% of the time, but if for some reason I turn up bang on time I find out that the bus has arrived early for once and not waited for the right time to set off. Fucking wankers. They're never early when you're waiting, but if you're on time they've been and gone! What the fuck!!!
AND No matter what happens, there's ALWAYS some fucking scally knob heads sat at the back playing fucking shit rap music through their crappy mobile phone speakers. Haven't these cunts heared of headphones? Nobody else on the bus wants to hear that shite.

MartinC wrote:I hope karma is real because that guys wife/kids will probably die in a fire now, and I'll drive past in a fucking fire engine and not stop for the cunt.

Hahahaa, I laughed my bollocks off at that.

thrashduck wrote:Because you spelled docile wrong, you now have to repeat the story in it's entirety.

And spelled 'here' instead of 'hear'.

Herzeleid wrote:This one time, I was about to get on the bus, just about to hand the money over to the driver when I notice something odd. I couldn't put my finger on it, but then I saw this bizarre gleam in his eye, it was Shang Tsung! He yelled out "YOUR SOUL IS MINE!!!" and we started fighting, after a while I managed to freeze him and uppercut his head off, releasing the souls of a thousand dead warriors.

Only problem was, I had to wait for the next bus, which was well bloody late, so I was half an hour late for work.

My brother went missing years ago after getting on a bus. I later found out that it was Shang Tsung's bus that he got on. Thank you for releasing his soul!

Herzeleid wrote:This one time, I was about to get on the bus, just about to hand the money over to the driver when I notice something odd. I couldn't put my finger on it, but then I saw this bizarre gleam in his eye, it was Shang Tsung! He yelled out "YOUR SOUL IS MINE!!!" and we started fighting, after a while I managed to freeze him and uppercut his head off, releasing the souls of a thousand dead warriors.

Only problem was, I had to wait for the next bus, which was well bloody late, so I was half an hour late for work.

I had a similar experience but the bus driver was a tranny...

boovidge wrote:I waited ages for buses today, i would have walked but it was so hot. The bus driver drove past this black guy that was clearly putting his arm out. The daft racist.

a similar style of discrimination was used against me.basicly i was in bromley getting a refund at a small video game shop.i then looked for the nearest bus stop to get back to the station as this shop was neally half hour walk away.
anyway i was at the bus stop waving my arm and he wasnt slowing so i stuck my left foot in the road to try and make it more obvious and the driver just stared at me and went round me,i had to take step back on the pavement.
im sure it coz i had my shades and a band tshirt on,and a small bag on my shoulder which id used to carry the item back to the shop(not full of cheap beer).it was all rural and a cosy little area so i possibly looked a tad out of place.
either way whatever the reason.bus drivers are still wankstains.

we have a local driver who is king of his bus.he has tinted paedo glasses and a little hitler moustache.the bus is like his pride and joy.he is like a BAA security worker.he is allowed to crack jokes and be sarcastic etc,but the minute someone says something clever back he wont have it and usually tells them to get off.
im sure each morning at the depot when he starts the engine,he probably ejaculates with all the excitement and feeling of power.
if buses didnt have cctv he would definately have been spat at or had his head smashed in.
also they have these plastic window barrier thingys now.which allows driver to be mouthier to pretty much anyone and cower behind it.

another thing,why is it that on my local buses no matter when i catch one,there is always the resident looneys on there.theres never naughty chavs at the back but instead you have the nutjobs like about 20-30years old but with a 6year old brain mentality who have been let out for the day(with thier destination written down on a small bit of paper )and they either stare or talk to people making them real uneasy(not me as i have headphones on)
its like theyve given their carer the slip and gone on an escape mission.also thier hair is never styled,just in a big electrocuted style mess.the minute they get on and talk to the drivr you know they are a potential danger.
now if drivers arent gonna let people on why cant it be these fruitcakes

Metal Iain wrote:the horrible sauce Heinz use in their Spaghetti Hoops.

If you put tobasco sauce in it, it's quite nice.

Or a sweet brand of tomato ketchup, like Tesco

James wrote:

thrashduck wrote:Get a student card and Bob's your mother's brother.

Young Persons Railcards do save you a shitload (and are attainable until you're 25), but even using one of those a return to London from here is £14.50, and I don't think that's peak time either.

a 2/12 hour journey from Leicester to my home costs £40 WITH a student rail card. Those that have a basic skill in maths and a knowledge of the discount the card gets you will realise that the cost without discount is £60!! "What a fookin' disgrace."

Even though the train companies are supposed to be regulated they still increase the price way over inflation every year. Gooooordaaann!

Prices of public transport in Ireland seem to be much more reasonable so far.

Hmm, having said that - I can get a return London-Birmingham that is valid for a month, for £11.90 with my railcard (which was free with Natwest bank )
and returns London-Sheffield for £20 or less if bought at the right time - advance tickets are the way to go.
Still, short distance journeys can prove to be stupidly expensive for what they are.

boovidge wrote:

James wrote:

thrashduck wrote:Get a student card and Bob's your mother's brother.

Young Persons Railcards do save you a shitload (and are attainable until you're 25), but even using one of those a return to London from here is £14.50, and I don't think that's peak time either.

a 2/12 hour journey from Leicester to my home costs £40 WITH a student rail card. Those that have a basic skill in maths and a knowledge of the discount the card gets you will realise that the cost without discount is £60!! "What a fookin' disgrace."

Even though the train companies are supposed to be regulated they still increase the price way over inflation every year. Gooooordaaann!

Prices of public transport in Ireland seem to be much more reasonable so far.

Since when have you lived in Ireland?!

Katze wrote:Hmm, having said that - I can get a return London-Birmingham that is valid for a month, for £11.90 with my railcard (which was free with Natwest bank )
and returns London-Sheffield for £20 or less if bought at the right time - advance tickets are the way to go.
Still, short distance journeys can prove to be stupidly expensive for what they are.

yea thats another thing. I couldnt book advance tickets because the train companies dont take visa electron cards (which are accepted just about everywhere else) It's a fookin' disgrace.