exhillerating hills

please tell me that was an intentional epic pun

guaranteed to be a perfect lady or gentleman - lol

rik - seek professional help

The Fourth Norseman wrote:rik - seek professional help

i got a B and a C grade in english at school(my best subject gradewise)so i dont really need help with story making to be honest.

also ironically,me,my dad and my brother all watched the 3 south park "imaginationland" episodes earlier on so that kinda put me in the mood to try and write my own little creative masterpiece on here.

i meant psychiatric help...

Rik......your story is brilliant Im sure its better than what you have happened if you clicked the link.

Apple Surprise

November, Africa—What was supposed to be a routine apple-picking trip turned into something much more. June and Donald went to Brian Johnson's farm to pick apples. This was a funny sort of farm! To get to the orchard, they rode on a milk truck driven by Mikael Akerfeldt! June and Donald went about picking their apples, and they filled two big bags with the most orange apples they had ever seen.

Suddenly, Jamie Elton happened to ride by on a Horse and offered to turn the apples into a delicious pie, right there in the orchard. June and Donald didn't believe that this was possible, but they agreed. Jamie Elton told them to close their eyes, and before they knew it, the apples were steaming, hot apple pies. June and Donald couldn't believe their eyes! They were so amazed, they ran home and called Cock Lord. When Brian Johnson was contacted about this matter, a reporter was informed that this “miracle” was “just a really idiot practical joke”!

The Fourth Norseman wrote:i prefer mine:

Up Close and Personal

Welcome to The levi mcglinchley Show! Tonight levi mcglinchley will be interviewing michael jackson.

levi mcglinchley: And here's my first guest now. Glad you could join us tonight, michael jackson. Having you on the show makes me feel sexual!

michael jackson: It makes me feel sexual, too, levi mcglinchley! It's exciting of you to invite me.

levi mcglinchley: There's been a lot of tearful talk about your trip to uganda with Mrs. Bolton. In fact, in today's daily mail, benjamin william richard howell wrote a column about your trip.

michael jackson: I read it, but that reporter made up the whole story. Mrs. Bolton and I have never even been to uganda. In fact, we haven't been out of bradford for 37 years.

levi mcglinchley: Sounds like you were framed.

michael jackson: That's right. What else would you like to know?

levi mcglinchley: Is it true that you own more than 26 faberge eggs?

michael jackson: I do own faberge eggs, but only two.

levi mcglinchley: Well folks, we're out of time. Thanks, michael jackson. I really enjoyed spooning with you!

michael jackson: I enjoyed spooning with you, too!

Spooning Michael Jackson ftw.

i planned all this whilst sitting on the toilet wanking out my 3rd load of the day whilst reflecting on the gig and moira stewart and how i tricked a toddler into giving a retard a blowjob.

Oh Rik, you-a so crazy!

Learn to Be a Rock Star
I'm at a new school. Its name is “The Joe School for Rock Stars.” The courses here are Damp!

My first assignment is to learn to play the Banjo and sing like a rock star. To be a good rock star, I'm supposed to look around a lot, to Destory across the stage, and to Masturbate at the audience. I did not act like that at my old school, so I think I'll have to work on it for a while; this will be interesting homework.

My second assignment is to learn to have an entourage, which is a group of people that always seems to follow around a rock star. I have a lot of friends, but for this assignment I suddenly have 1000010000010000 people following me around, telling me how Round I am, how they really like my parashoot pants, and how I am the most Cold person ever. I can't be sure, but I think they are just saying that.

My final assignment is to put on a rock concert. I have to arrive in a(n) Pimpmobile and walk the Blue but kind of purple carpet, past all the punching fans with cameras flashing in my face. Then, when I get inside, my entourage will be there and I will run with them to the stage. Next, I'll perform 2660 songs, all while Licking across the stage, singing, and spreading at the audience. This will be the toughest final exam I've ever had, and the one I'll never forget!