Joke Thread
Moderators: James, Craig, Resilience Records
radioactive rik wrote:rape is no laughing matter......
unless it involves a clown!
I rang the Rape Advice line yesterday,bit of a disapointment though,it turns out it's only for victims!
"Thorn wishes aegis,rapturous beasts below"
"Aegis arising,the colours of space"
we fall to rise
"Aegis arising,the colours of space"
we fall to rise
- ribbons69
- Posts: 1488
- Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2007 9:45 pm
- Location: the mirror black
- RedBurp
- Posts: 860
- Joined: Wed Aug 08, 2007 10:47 am
- Location: Andover, Hampshire
A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks, "Excuthe me, do you have widdle wabbits?"
The shop keeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he's on her level, and says, "Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft, fuffy bwack wabbit, or one like that widdle Bwown wabbit over there?"
The little girl blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and whispers...
"I don't weally fink my pet pyfon gives a phuk ."
The shop keeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he's on her level, and says, "Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft, fuffy bwack wabbit, or one like that widdle Bwown wabbit over there?"
The little girl blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and whispers...
"I don't weally fink my pet pyfon gives a phuk ."
Personal Site | Freelance Web Design | Last.fm
Bash.org wrote:<Patrician|Away> what does your robot do, sam
<bovril> it collects data about the surrounding environment, then discards it and drives into walls
- Craig
Administrator - Posts: 981
- Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2006 7:06 pm
- Location: Witham, Essex, UK
Booooooooooooooo!!
I'm going to
Tear your fuckin' eyes out,
Rip your fuckin' flesh off,
Beat you 'till you're just a fucking lifeless carcass,
Fuck you and your progress,
Watch me fucking regress,
You were made to take the fall,
Now you're nothing!!
Tear your fuckin' eyes out,
Rip your fuckin' flesh off,
Beat you 'till you're just a fucking lifeless carcass,
Fuck you and your progress,
Watch me fucking regress,
You were made to take the fall,
Now you're nothing!!
- Styxx
- Posts: 1250
- Joined: Tue Jan 30, 2007 2:31 am
- Location: Huddersfield
hahahahahaha
P.S. at the boo.
P.S. at the boo.
thrashduck wrote:And the internet was without uk thrash form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of James moved upon the face of the waters.
"No Hellscourger, I would not like a strawberry."
- James
Administrator - Posts: 8334
- Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2006 6:17 pm
- Location: Witham, Essex
Re: Joke Thread
My wife is such a lazy cow,
I went to have a piss in the sink this morning,and it was still full of dishes!
I went to have a piss in the sink this morning,and it was still full of dishes!
"Thorn wishes aegis,rapturous beasts below"
"Aegis arising,the colours of space"
we fall to rise
"Aegis arising,the colours of space"
we fall to rise
- ribbons69
- Posts: 1488
- Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2007 9:45 pm
- Location: the mirror black
Re: Joke Thread
A REALLY bad joke I got told the other day
Whats Job For A Cowboy's favourtie cheese?
Bree Bree
Whats Job For A Cowboy's favourtie cheese?
Bree Bree
Dian Wei wrote:It's that UKT vibe, we all basically are gay for one another.
- thrasherdave
- Posts: 2402
- Joined: Wed Mar 12, 2008 6:45 pm
- Location: Sheffield, UK
Re: Joke Thread
*Brie?
Ribbons, congrats man, that was a good one!!!
Ribbons, congrats man, that was a good one!!!
- thrash metal maniac
- Posts: 5499
- Joined: Fri Mar 24, 2006 5:20 pm
- Location: Bristol
Re: Joke Thread
thrasherdave wrote:A REALLY bad joke I got told the other day
Whats Job For A Cowboy's favourtie cheese?
Bree Bree
Sorry, but can you explain that one? Do I need to have actually paid attention to any of their songs to get it?
I'm going to
Tear your fuckin' eyes out,
Rip your fuckin' flesh off,
Beat you 'till you're just a fucking lifeless carcass,
Fuck you and your progress,
Watch me fucking regress,
You were made to take the fall,
Now you're nothing!!
Tear your fuckin' eyes out,
Rip your fuckin' flesh off,
Beat you 'till you're just a fucking lifeless carcass,
Fuck you and your progress,
Watch me fucking regress,
You were made to take the fall,
Now you're nothing!!
- Styxx
- Posts: 1250
- Joined: Tue Jan 30, 2007 2:31 am
- Location: Huddersfield
Re: Joke Thread
Styxx wrote:thrasherdave wrote:A REALLY bad joke I got told the other day
Whats Job For A Cowboy's favourtie cheese?
Bree Bree
Sorry, but can you explain that one? Do I need to have actually paid attention to any of their songs to get it?
Because their vocal style sounds like this "BREE BREE BREEEEEE"
- GoreBastard
- Posts: 1718
- Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2007 8:26 am
- Location: Quiverpool
Re: Joke Thread
Hahaha! Right fair enough. That one doesn't come accross as well in text form
I'm going to
Tear your fuckin' eyes out,
Rip your fuckin' flesh off,
Beat you 'till you're just a fucking lifeless carcass,
Fuck you and your progress,
Watch me fucking regress,
You were made to take the fall,
Now you're nothing!!
Tear your fuckin' eyes out,
Rip your fuckin' flesh off,
Beat you 'till you're just a fucking lifeless carcass,
Fuck you and your progress,
Watch me fucking regress,
You were made to take the fall,
Now you're nothing!!
- Styxx
- Posts: 1250
- Joined: Tue Jan 30, 2007 2:31 am
- Location: Huddersfield
Re: Joke Thread
haha I told you it was bad
Dian Wei wrote:It's that UKT vibe, we all basically are gay for one another.
- thrasherdave
- Posts: 2402
- Joined: Wed Mar 12, 2008 6:45 pm
- Location: Sheffield, UK
Re: Joke Thread
It was brilliant. I told all my mates like I thought of it.
James wrote:This Facebook notification says it all really:
Martin James Crawford became a fan of Heretic (1 fan).
- Lev
- Posts: 7108
- Joined: Tue Aug 28, 2007 11:17 am
- Location: Thursby, Cumbria